And Love Will Come To Us

Last Sunday, I received a call from an ex-colleague. And I was delighted to hear from him again! Like me, he is a child of God, who is rooted and growing in Christ. And what's more is that he is also charming, good-looking, well-built, able to tame his tongue, always bold enough to proclaim God's Name to our other colleagues(pre-believers) and received mockings from them. And, He is still single and available! This brings us to our next topic.

Seeking for love.

We have known each other for more than 3 years now. And he remains unattach. But I know he is always on a look-out for his "lost-rib". Fast-forward 3 years, he is still searching for her and is now, desperate. (This is what we agreed and confessed. We re desperate. Haha)

He shared that he did make some new friends(all ladies) and the way he approached is daring to me. Full of courage and confidence I must say. Which he shouldn't be lacking due to his good-looks he received from the Lord. However, after listening to him, (on how he approached the ladies) I felt uneasy. And because we are brothers in Christ, I could speak to him and he knows where Im coming from. I shared with him that I felt the Lord said.."Do not fret..." and He wants us to continue to wait and hope in Him, to present us our "lost-rib" so that we will be complete. Therefore, its totally unnecessary for us to seek her intentionally, especially via dubious methods.

I really thank God for our conversations. Because He was right there with us. And I realised that He likes to use a certain way to speak to me. And that is through my 'preaching' to others. Whenever I 'preached', I received preaching from the Holy Spirit as well. The words I shared speaks directly to my heart. So I guess this is what He meant by "Iron sharpens iron".

This was how we conclude.

We will surrender our life to Him.
Especially our love life.

We will fret not.
And we will not seek one intentionally. (as in like a desperate)

Its a risk.
But we are willing to put our trust in Him,
Who is good and faithful.

And I continued.
The Lord knows me much more better than I do.
And if He knows I needed one,
will He not bless me?
In His special way; His special timing.

And I am willing.
To be single or married.
As long as its His plans for me.

I told my friend.
You are a prince.
Not a desperado.

And love will come to us.

"Be Patient With Yourself"

"Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it." - Mat 7:13-14 (even fewer, who after found it, willing to walk and go in by it.)

If we are going to live as disciples of Jesus, we have to remember that all efforts of worth and excellence are difficult. The christian life is gloriously difficult, but its difficulty does not make us faint and cave in-it stirs us up to overcome.

These are the opening lines found in "My Utmost For His Highest", July 7 passage. And I totally agree that a Christian walk is tough and difficult. But we all should relished all challenges (in order to be God's holy people) in the name of our Lord. And we had received the motivation and the power we needed to overcome the world in our Lord's death and resurrection. I mean Our Lord,Jesus Christ had paid a hefty price in order to redeem us all. But are we willing to pay the high price of giving up our rights to live our lives back to God,Who loves us?

I struggled alot for the past few days. Struggled to be holy in my thoughts,words and actions. And failed. Inevitably, I was disappointed with myself. And sometimes, disappointment can be so dangerous. Therefore, I realised that Disappointment is one of the devil's favourite weapon when we failed to deal with it with God's love. Mr S.A Tan loves to use disappointment to draw us away from God or even,.. abandon God! That is why some of our friends had chose to leave God. Because of hardships and disappointments and also, believing in a lie that they are not worthy to be Christian. Who is worthy to be Christian? You tell me. We are not perfect. But if we are willing to repent and change for God, that is enough. And one day, I believed, we will be like Christ. However, this process could be a gradual one and might even last til we meet God face to face. But, take heart, He is love and His mercy remains.

Back to my story, I was really disappointed and heard the devil's cries. He lied to me that The Way is really tough and I will not be able to change. So why not leave behind all the hardships and "foolishness" and enter the broad road where you will most likely be more happy as you can do whatever you like. Then God intervened. He encourages me and I told myself that I will not give up (transforming myself to be like Christ) because He never give up on me. And He said to me: "Be patient with yourself." And my heart stop condemning me and I could move on. (As my heart was condemning me, I could only stop and stare at the world and life. I could moved but only like a zombie, moving aimlessly. Therefore, I thank God that these movements wasn't long. Just a few steps but surely enough to scare me as I tasted how it was like to live life without any purposes. The feeling was terrible.)

It is true that I was too eager to change all of my old-self for God in a short time. I heed God's advice and realised that it works. I am changing inwardly everyday. Like we all know and I always like to say, "No one remains the same after meeting/speaking to God. And when God speaks, we will never be the same again."

Revelations came after my reflections (on what I have been through) and I realised that its good to have struggles and face them. Because after overcoming each struggle, we will grow in stature and wisdom. So, we all need struggles in order to grow.

Embrace them.

"You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the One Who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world." - 1 John 4:4

How Timely Is God's Words!

I was feeling abit uneasy. I don't know why. Or maybe I know. It could be that I am still feeling sick; Could be that I saw her last sun and even had lunch together with a group; Could be the appraisal that i just went thru yesterday. Anyhow, I just felt uneasy inside me. And my diet confirm that something is not right in me. Beside normal healthy meals, i went on a-junk-attack mission! I had a cup of marigold fruit salad yoghurt before dinner. That's normal. Had a bottle of grape flavour yakult after dinner. That's healthy! Helped myself to finish a three-quarter full tub Haagen-daz Green Tea ice-cream! That's foolish! Given that I was still not feeling too well! And then, had another serving of marigold yoghurt. This time is the peach flavour. (Two "yoghurt" is better than one.) Then, search for more junkies and found only two packets of "Fairprice" rolled cuttlefish. And I simply rolled one packet into my mouth, down to my stomach. Ha. Quite thirsty now. So drank a packet of cold Milo which gives me extra unnecessary tonic and further harm to my cough. Unsatisfied, I sms my sis to buy for me my craving snacks - Baby Star crispy noodle spicy flavour! Which taste like the cheap 20 cents "MaMee" but better. (Had to be, right?! If not, how to justify the higher price-tag!) Here she comes back home and my sufferings ended.(or just started?) I quickly opened up a packet of crispy noodle and dunk em into my horse mouth. Yummy. Left abit for my sis to finish a great move started by me! Surprisingly, she bought more than I asked for. She also brought home 2 packets of Japanese crispy seaweed - hot and spicy flavour! My fav Flava, which will hurt my throat without failed after one serving. And its spiciness will send the driver's high into my head. So, without any hesitation or second thoughts, me and my sis double team to finish one pack! Our movements and passing of that hapless seaweed pack was sweet, swift and smooth. It was near perfection. We just could read each others thoughts and ideas. If I were to use one word to describe the game. Whimsical!

By now, my throat is ultra dry. So i approached my mum to cut guava for me. And as always, she obliged with a mother's love. Still feeling dry, i made myself a cup of Lipton's "Iron-Buddha-tea". Sounds complex, but actually very easy to prepare. Just dunk an iron-buddha tea bag into a cup of hot water will do. After the tea, i felt better as it aids my digestive system. However, i do still felt that my stomach is bloated and exploding soon. Unless I could do a Pearl Harbour real quick inside the rest room. But it did not came. So I suffered.

Anyway, I proceeded to read God's words in my daily devotion book, My Utmost For His Highest. And the verse I encountered sets me free! Psa 37:8 " do not fret - it leads only to evil."

I must be fretting. My actions tells me so. All the uneasy feelings; All the eating of junkies. And they don't filled the empty void inside me nor they satisfied me. Only after I read this verse, I feel better. Breathe easier. And i just fret no more.

No fretting about my past. (my past relationship issue) No fretting about my present.(my current job and its appraisal) And no fretting about my future.(my future relationship and my calling) I just tell God that I will not fret about anything concerns me. All because He cares for me. Amen.

O God, I love You.